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on Sep 8th, 2012 and filed under
Google Tech Talks September 2, 2008 ABSTRACT We have been brought up to believe that the mind is located inside the head. But there are good reasons for thinking that this view is too limited. Recent experimental results show that people can influence others at a distance just by looking at them, even if they look from behind and if all sensory clues are eliminated. And people’s intentions can be detected by animals from miles away. The commonest kind of non-local interaction mental influence occurs in connection with telephone calls, where most people have had the experience of thinking of someone shortly before they ring. Controlled, randomized tests on telephone telepathy have given highly significant positive results. Research techniques have now been automated and experiments on telepathy are now being conducted through the internet and cell phones, enabling widespread participation. Speaker: Rupert Sheldrake Rupert Sheldrake, Ph.D. is a biologist and author of more than 75 technical papers and ten books, the most recent being The Sense of Being Stared At. He studied at Cambridge and Harvard Universities, was a Fellow of Clare College, Cambridge and a Research Fellow of the Royal Society. He is currently Director of the Perrott-Warrick project, funded from Trinity College Cambridge.
I have a friend, who isn’t really a friend, she just sticks with me in the two classes we share, technology and VA. She’s always uncomfortably close to me, but I ignored that because I didn’t want to freak her out about my space issues.
In tech, I came late, and I have no where to sit. But then she got me a seat and put it right next to hers, and said to me, “Now nothing is separating us!” then laughed and said “Except for this table.”
Then, in VA, we were doing Photoshop, and she had finished her project. She went over to me, sitting so close that our shoulders were touching, and I just went on with my project. Then she hugged my arm and leaned her head on my shoulder.
WAY too much of a space invader. I reserve that kind of contact with someone I’m interested in, or a close family member. But I barely know this girl. Don’t even know what her last name is!
I’m a girl, too, which freaks me out even more.
Can I avoid this contact/show that I don’t want it without directly confronting her about it? I don’t want to be mean, but I’m very uncomfortable with people making contact with me that way.
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Oh god, I know what you mean. I used to have a friend just like this.
I’d kinda avoid talking/hanging out with her and just try sitting with friends or alone. She’ll get the hint after awhile and eventually will give up trying to be all up against you. I tried being as soft/gentle about telling her not to but she didn’t take the multiple hints.
Be firm about not starting up chats with her or if she does start one – you don’t have to ignore her, just don’t contribute much to the conversation.
ugh! my friend does that too! and i kinda like move around and jump up and say oops i gotta do something. its weird and disgusting! and even though shes my friend, i dont want to think it but i do think she could be a lesbian.
but that might not be it with your “friend” or mine. they are probably people who are used to being close with people and everything. just move around and hopefully she will get the sign that oh she probably wants her space
O baby girls seem to do me like that and I hate it. You need to speak up but be soft about it tell her when she’s touching you that she needs to keep her hands to herself or nicely tell her hey that’s weird. She needs to know tell her straight up shes making you uncomfortable. Stop being so quiet
Just tell her. If she doesn’t matter much then you shouldn’t mind if she gets mad or offended. She is the one who got in your space, so just handle up on her. I wouldn’t like all that from someone I just met, let alone some random chic.
Just let her know that you enjoy a little space between your bodies.She is probably unaware of the closeness or she is attracted to you.
You are not being mean by clearly stating your boundaries. You have to tell her you don’t like it when she gets to close to you and could she please give you some space. That isn’t mean, that is polite but firm.
If she freaks out, cries, or gets all sullen and emo on you, that is not your problem, that is hers. You can’t control her emotions or the way she reacts to things…the only one who can control that is her. If she wants to “freak out”, let her and just ignore it. She’ll only make herself look bad, and if she wants to do that, it’s her choice to do so. As I said, whatever her reactions are, are her problems to deal with, not yours.